Thoughts on Rango

Tuesday, March 15, 2011 6:34 PM By Simon

-A pet with an identity crisis (Johnny Depp) gets lost in the desert, meeting up with a town desperate for (uh) a hero. And junk.

-First, let me tell of my experience seeing this business. It was, see, a Tuesday afternoon. It was awesome. The theatre was empty, and me and my sister motherfucking danced up the aisles, chatted with the imaginary projectionist (our theatre, like all the others, have switched to digital), hurled abuse at the too-easy trivia quizzes, provided running commentary for the trailers, but then, of course, some people showed up and we were stuck being normal patrons. My ass.

-On to the show. This was the weirdest kids' movie I've ever seen (in these watered-down days, anyway). Everything's covered in a coating of beautiful, beautiful grime, there's all sorts of exisential angst, people get killed and hardcore-threatened and there's some sirens following our Hero Rango.

-Speaking of, he's not terribly likable. A cowardly asshole at the worst of times, he, of course, redeems himself, but I kind of wanted to throttle the little shit. Depp switches from Kermit-voiced vaudville to mumbling wisecracks in some alright voice work. Isla Fisher is the love interest, a BAMF farmgirl, Ned Beatty is a slightly less molesty version of the John Huston character in Chinatown (complete with a water control plot), some other people are some other things.

-We're running out of water, bro. Shit.

-HOLY MOTHERFUCKER, know who shows up? Hunter S. Thompsan and Dr. Gonzo? Yeah. The Man With No Name? Fuck yeah. My life is complete.


Ryan McNeil said...

Fuckin' unexpected, ain't it?

March 15, 2011 at 8:51 PM
Alex said...

I am reading/seeing so many strange things about this movie, I can't get an idea of what it is actually like. I guess I'll have to see it eventually.

March 15, 2011 at 9:06 PM
JL said...

I'm going to have to check this one out. It wasn't entirely on my radar to begin with, but with the things I keep hearing, I'm going to have to see for myself eventually.

March 16, 2011 at 1:06 AM
Luke said...

Haha! I'm definitely identifying with the "we have the theater to ourselves!" moment. It's so exciting and yet so fleeting...

March 16, 2011 at 6:17 AM
SugaryCynic said...

well shit. Now I have to see it.

March 16, 2011 at 7:15 AM
"Yojimbo_5" said...

"slightly less molesty" more phrase I'd wished I'd come up with...

And from the kink in his neck, someone obviously throttled him previously.

It's some fun, ain't it?

March 16, 2011 at 10:00 AM
M. Carter @ the Movies said...

Huh. Rango sounds a lot like Icabod Crane in "Sleepy Hollow." Johnny Depp seems to prefer playing cowardly asholes.

March 16, 2011 at 10:09 AM
Simon said...

Hatter: Indeed.

Alex: It's like an old Leone film as seen through the eyes of a child who was sent back to the seventies a few months ago, and is still has a bit of hypoxia from the trip.

JL: Yes.

Luke: The thing is, I can't even tell people about it, because then everyone will be showing up after school on Tuesday, getting all up in our business...

Sugary: I'm taking that at face value. I expect a review by Monday.

Yojimbo: Trend-setter, hazzah!

M.Carter: Well, I imagine it's fun dreaming up new ways to get the audience on your side.

March 19, 2011 at 1:06 PM
Colin Biggs said...

Certainly was fun. Seeing Dr. Gonzo onscreen was a surprise to say in the least.

March 20, 2011 at 7:52 PM