Critically Acclaimed Movies I Don't Get The Appeal Of

Monday, November 15, 2010 1:59 PM By Simon

1) Million Dollar Baby
Every time Hilary Swank looks up at Clint Eastwood with those fucking doe-eyes and calls him Boss, I want to smack the naive spunkiness right out of her.

2) Last of the Mohicans
I mean...seriously, what's the big deal? It has a nice score, yes, but I found it bloated and ridiculous, with no real characterization of the supposed main character (Superactor Daniel Day-Lewis, of course, does nothing wrong, although I also question why everybody made such a fuss about his performance as well), focusing most of its attention on two dead-eyed General's daughters. It's a lovely exploration of the start of America, but man.

3) The Blind Side
You know, guys. You know.


Melanie's Randomness said...

Million Dollar Baby just hurt to watch. I saw it once & never again. I don't know how people can own it & love it. Seriously.

Melanie's Randomness

November 15, 2010 at 2:32 PM
Jason H. said...

I haven't seen Million Dollar Baby yet, so I can't say anything about it. I've seen Last of the Mohicans, but can't remember much, which probably says something. And as for The Blind Side: the less said about that racist white-guilt fairy tale, the better.

November 15, 2010 at 2:40 PM
Ryan T. said...

I would call The Blind Side critically acclaimed. I mean yeah Bullock won the Oscar, but the film itself got totally mixed reviews.

With that said, I actually loved Million Dollar Baby. I was one of those people who was totally crying by the end and cheered it on to its Oscar glory that night.

November 15, 2010 at 3:14 PM
Andrew K. said...

I am right there with you when it comes to Million Dollar Baby.

November 15, 2010 at 4:03 PM
Unknown said...

I don't think The Blind Side was critically acclaimed. It got mixed reviews and if it wasn't for SaBu's Oscar theft it wouldn't be even talked about a month after it premiered.
Few movies make me want to smack people like this one does.


November 15, 2010 at 5:10 PM
Simon said...

Melanie: It's so weepy and unsubtle. God.

Jason: Let's pretend it just doesn't exist outside of Lifetime hell.

Ryan: It got an Oscar nomination, which implies way too much prestige for my tastes. And that's okay. I cried during Click.

Andrew: Hazzah!

Jose: Just close your eyes picture Abbie Cornish with that damn statue, and all will be well.

November 15, 2010 at 6:23 PM
SugaryCynic said...

Either College Humor or Cracked did a thing called "if Oscar nominated movie titles were honest" and The Blind Side was "White Lady Saves the Day" that about sums up my thoughts on it. BONUS ANECDOTE: My friend Zeke loved the "white lady" joke too, and for some reason after he saw it he kept mashing the two titles together and ended up calling it "blind lady saves the day" which I would totally watch

November 15, 2010 at 6:46 PM
"Yojimbo_5" said...

The decidedly mixed crowd I saw "The Blind Side" loved it...although I couldn't help but get uncomfortable in my seat.

"Last of the Mohicans?" meh. Am I the only one who thinks Daniel Day-Lewis is a ham?

Loved "Million Dollar Baby." Nyeeeeah.

November 15, 2010 at 7:26 PM
Chris said...

I thought "Million dollar baby" was ok, but not really deserving best picture oscar, all I can think is it was a weak year in that category.

Funny someone says "Last of the Mohicans" was easily forgotten, I think I've seen it twice, but can't remember a thing about it ( :

November 16, 2010 at 6:16 AM
Nick Prigge said...

First, I greatly enjoying reading your blog. Second, you just trashed my two favorite movies of all time with 1) and 2). So if I jump off a bridge tonight I am blaming you.

November 16, 2010 at 7:38 AM
Derek Armstrong said...

Yeah, have a heart, Simon. Nicholas' damn avatar is a picture of Day-Lewis from Last of the Mohicans. How could you be so hurtful?

(Love Last of the Mohicans. One of Mann's best.)

Million Dollar Baby is meh and you lose credibility for even including The Blind Side in this discussion. However, you gain that credibility back by throwing some love to Click. Click is, like, good. Well, at least the second half is good.

November 16, 2010 at 3:22 PM
Castor said...

The Last of The Mohicans is awesome! That's all I'm going to say lady.

November 16, 2010 at 8:11 PM
Simon said...

Sugary: That was Cracked.

Yojimbo: He's not a ham, so much as, like, really intense.

moviesandsongs: Or maybe the Oscars were still falling hard into the bait.

Nicholas Prigg: First, thank you. Second, I know. Three, but will it really solve your problems with your father?

Vancetastic: I had to watch it for History class, Vance. Things get jumbled, but I stand by my statement. Click is the last movie I've seen in theatres to make me cry.

Castor: Then this is all I will say, sir.

November 17, 2010 at 2:04 PM
Anonymous said...

TBS is... above average. I've seen worse movies about white guilt. Yeah, I said it.

When I saw MDB's name on that list, I had a minor myocardial infarction. Maybe I'm just a sucker for Hilary Swank.

November 18, 2010 at 2:13 PM
Angel said...

The Blind Side had me sleeping half of the film. I thought that it was somehow interesting but it turned out so boring. Sorry.

November 18, 2010 at 10:10 PM