Bad News

Friday, March 26, 2010 2:20 PM By Simon

Well, as we all know, when the Movie gods give us, they also fuck us over. They are passive-aggressive that way.

Orson Welles is being brought back to life for the voiceover on a sure-to-be-shitty CGI-ified kiddie movie.

Both Eastern Promises and Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid are getting sequels. All continuing where they left off, except so far, Sundance is MIA.

In probably the weirdest pairing since my fantasy Carl Barat-John Lennon duet, Tracy Morgan and Juliette Binoche have joined the cast of a movie. That being, the same movie. Directed by A Guide To Recognizing Your Saints director/writer Diot Montiel, called 'Son of No One', it (naturally) is set to star Channing Tatum "as a young cop assigned to the working class neighborhood where he grew up. He soon finds an old secret has begun to resurface and threatens to destroy his family". Binoche plays a reporter while Morgan is replacing Terrence Howard in the role of Vinnie, a friend of Tatum's. Al Pacino, Ray Liotta and Katie Holmes also star.

(hey, remember when everyone saw "...Saints" and were abuzz with all the promise Tatum showed? We all thought, yo, that dude's gonna blow the fuck up one day. We even gave him a Spirit. I miss those days...)

A World War II (The Revenge) drama based off of Ian Fleming's exploits in an elite forces unit is set to star Danny Dyer and Sean Bean.

In linkage, Final Girl lists her favorite things.

Life During Wartime has a lovely poster.

Wikipedia vs. Predator.

Michael Bay is spot on in his criticsm of post-production 3D-conversion. For once, the man speaks the truth. Here we be.

Monkey See Blog on film criticsm. A good piece, I think.

A pretty good motion poster for The Other Guys, starring Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg. Since I can't do anything with it, here's a link.

Character poster for The Losers, a comic book movie that doesn't try to be all gritty and shit. Here's my favorite.

Kate Hudson, Ginnifer Goodwin, and John Krasinski may all be on for a romantic comedy called 'Something Borrowed', about " Manhattan attorney (Goodwin) who becomes involved with her best friend's fiance following her 30th birthday".

Best title for an in-development film by a French director named Arnaud Desplechin? 'Psychotherapy Of A Plains Indian'.

Tahar Rahim, fresh off of A Prophet, is now up for Emir Kusturica's Palestinian comedy, 'Cool Water'. The film will see Rahim play one of two brothers who try to smuggle the body of their recently deceased father from Jerusalem to Ramallah while trying to avoid Israeli police and Russian mobsters. In related news, Arizona Dream is finally getting released.

The trailer for David Michôd's eagerly awaited new crime drama Animal Kingdom is released. Here's The Playlist with the Happening.

Happy Friday.